commentary #1

In response to Semiramiss's essay, the opening is great and I really like the first sentence because I think that everyone can relate that we all us and/or rely on technology. The point of the essay is stated very clearly in the introductory paragraph. I also like how you don’t shoot down how technology and the internet are helpful to us and that it is not all negative. Your main reasons are stated in the first paragraph, which is good. I think you should have included not staying in touch with family and friends as part of your three reasons in the intro because it is a topic you speak about in your body paragraphs.

            I also enjoyed how you admitted that you might also be someone who overuses technology because you are relating to the reader and not just saying how people that use technology too  much are lazy. I also liked the quotes you chose from different articles, they fit well with what you’re talking about and back up your argument. You also have good rebuttals’ and back up your arguments well.

            One thing that confused was the part where you talked about how the percentage of people addicted to the internet is correlated with the amount of people addicted to cocaine or alcohol, I’m not really sure if that is a valid correlation and you might not want to add that in your paper. But if you did, I would elaborate on it more and explain in detail, possibly taking a full paragraph. All in all I enjoyed ready your paper, even though I wrote about the exact opposite view point haha. I could still relate and understand your points and view on how technology may be affecting us badly. I wrote the same thing in my essay how technology is making us lazier, so I do agree with you on that!

first draft

Monica Rivera                                                                                                             Rivera 1

Professor Brown

English 1B

20, February 2013

How Technology Has Changed Us

            It is completely aware to most of human kind how we are living in a new world now, a world that is revolved and relied on technology such as; computers, internet, tablets, iPods, phones, etc. Therefore, I must bring up the controversial topic of is all our advanced technology actually helping us or hurting us? Technology is helping us by opening our minds to any information we need or want to know in a matter of a click, we are able to get things done faster and more efficient, we’re able to communicate with loved ones that don’t live within a close distance, and it helps us save lives.

            There are many ways that technology is helping us and one of the major reasons why is that anything we need to know or are just curious about is at our fingertips, by a click or push of a button our question is answered. It definitely has made us smarter beings because all of the knowledge we are available to from our desktops, laptops, tablets, and phones. Some might say that this in fact is actually making us “stupid” because of how easy it is to know something about a topic and that we’re not retaining or storing it in our brains. I can understand where someone would get that idea from, but technology in no way is making us less knowledgeable. One negative thing I do have to say with having so much technology available to us is that it might be making us lazier. That is because we do not have to physically get up and go to the library to

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pick out a book and do research on a certain homework assignment or project, but being physically lazy from time to time, does not make us less intelligent. It is so much easier and proficient to get research done with the internet; we are able to look up articles from journals and newspapers, books, and blogs in a matter of seconds. Just the internet alone cuts in half, if not more, the time it takes to complete a certain task at work or at school. From just typing this paper the technology of Microsoft Word has corrected me on my spelling or grammar, which without I might not have noticed and got docked down a few points on. It is also available to more people because before computers may have cost a thousand dollars or more, but now you can buy a reliable and trust worthy computer for five hundred dollars or less, so now it is easier for the majority of people to own their own computers or other electronics. Technology is not only making us more knowledgeable, but it is also making things easier and proficient to get things done in a certain amount of time.

             With all the advancements in technology we are able to keep in touch with our loved ones and friends that we would otherwise not be able to. This has all become available to us with the invention of the telephone in the 1870’s, now we are able to see the other person’s face through video chatting. Without technology we would never have the chance to keep in touch as much as we would like to with our family and friends that live in different states, countries, or even continents. Business’s even use video chatting for meetings now with different companies or workers that are in different areas of the world, this is another example of how technology is helping us be more proficient and achieve our goals at a more realistic time. We are also able communicate with our loved ones over sea at war and keep families and relationship strong because of this.

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A very important way technology has helped the world as a whole is our advancements in medicine. There is nothing to argue with here because through technology we are able to further people’s life expectancy and help them through illness or injury. For example, scientists are now doing an experiment that can actually make the blind see again and have succeeded in the latest experiment. “Blindness first began creeping up on Barbara Campbell when she was a teenager, and by her late 30s, her eye disease had stolen what was left of her sight. Now, as part of a striking experiment, she can see again. So far, she can detect burners on her stove when making a grilled cheese, her mirror frame, and whether her computer monitor is on. She is beginning an intensive three-year research project involving electrodes surgically implanted in her eye, a camera on the bridge of her nose and a video processor strapped to her waist. The project, involving patients in the United States, Mexico and Europe, is part of a burst of recent research aimed at one of science’s most-sought-after holy grails: making the blind see,” (Belluck, A1). I bring this example up of how technology is very crucial in the medical world because it is a topic that is close to my heart because my grandpa is legally blind through his diagnosis of mackerel degeneration and he is currently seeking assistance through a research experiment at UCLA. Without the technology that allows scientists to uncover such a discovery than my grandpa wouldn’t even have the hope to see again. With more time and advances in technology the hope of curing diseases and illnesses doesn’t seem like such a far fetch idea anymore because we are aware of everything technology can do for us now. I am sure that many people can relate to a time where technology has saved, cured, or bettered someone close to them, so how technology ever be a bad thing to us? Without it we might have to see the ones we care about go.

           

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Through technology we are able to receive information about anything we need to know from a click away, communicate with our friends and family at any time no matter where they might be, and save and better lives of the ones we care about. We live in a world surrounded by technology and electronic devices and by no means is it ever going to go away. If anything we are only going to become more technology advanced, where it’s going to be coming mandatory that you know how to work the newest electronic. It has already become mandatory in schools that you have or have access to the internet to complete your homework, assignments, and projects that are due through the use of the internet. All of my classes have a certain amount of time that is required to spend on the computer and internet. In fact most of my homework is done on the internet and must be turned in through the internet. It is the way we live our lives now from communications, school, work, to entertainment. Even if some still disagree that technology is helping us, doesn’t mean that it’s going to go anywhere anytime soon. And if it were to somehow vanish, I’m sure the world would panic and wouldn’t know what to do because of how reliant we are to it now.

           

"Waterboarding"

1.)    Should we torture captives?

2.)    Should waterboarding be allowed?

3.)    Is waterboarding a reliable tactic to get information out of captives?

 

Obviously as an American I do believe that torture is unjust, but I also do feel that there are certain occasions where there are exceptions. It’s not like Special Forces are going around and waterboarding innocent civilians as they please. They only use this tactic in special and extreme cases. These terrorists or other people that are a major threat to our country put themselves in the position to be forced for us to rely on other tactics to try and get them to confess or give us information. So I do not think it is fair for us as Americans and civilians to judge what the Special Forces do when handling dangerous people because this isn’t an ordinary situation and they are looking out for us and trying to protect us the best they can. People react differently when in extreme conditions and situations, so if they think that waterboarding is what is going to get the terrorists to cave in and confess that by all means I stand behind them.

Although, this does bring the question up of is waterboarding a reliable tactic to get information out of captives? As Hitchens says, “It may be a mean of extracting information, but it is also a means of extracting junk information. To put it briefly, even the C.I.A. sources for the Washington Post story on waterboarding conceded that the information they got out of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed was “not all of it reliable.” He goes on to say how it gives you memory loss and people confess things that do not even pertain to what they are asking…this being said, is it worth the torture and time to rely on this form of getting people come out with the answers to the questions they are asking?

anybody can become famous now a days....

1.) Does this generation even relaize what good music is?

2.) Is Lady Gaga a role model?

3.) Does this generation know the difference of whats reality and whats not?

Okay, I am going to touch on all three of the questions above. In my opinion I do not think that Lady Gaga is a superstar with actual talent, nor a good example of a role model. Gaga is a personality and character turned "superstar" by technology and auto-tone.

She associates her models as Elton John and the rest of the "greats," this does not mean that she is no where considered to be in the same catergory as them. Such artists have true, natural, and raw talent and aren't made famous by the things they where and do. If Gaga did not dress up and put an act on everytime she is photographed then she wouldn't be famous. My generation is mostly associated with famous people that become famous by making a fool of themselves on tv or the news to become famous.

So, I don't understand how anyone that becomes famous this way is in anyway a role model to anyone. I can see though how some might mistake her for a role model because she does speak out about gay rights and being who you are. Also, I don't understand how people look up to her for what she wears and does...do people not realize that she has people that dress her and tell her to act and that she doesn't think of any of the outlandish things she does on her own? To me, she is the last person to look up to because in my opinion everything about her is fake because this isn't who she is. How can someone be an activist on to be who you are when she isn't who she is?

In conclusion, I do not think that my generation knows the difference on whats reality and whats not. I say this because most of the people that are famous today are famous for "reality tv," in which isn't reality at all and is scripted. They look up to artists that don't actually have talents and claim to be oringinal when most to all the things they do are planned and not original in one bit.

Every one has their own opinions, let it be.

1.) Is David Weinberger's "A Marketplace of Echoes," asking us if the internet is making us stupid or if the internet is making us less diverse?

2.) Why are we always trying to figure out how something is harming the human race?

3.) Is the internet making us less diverse?

This is in response to question number three, "is the internet making us less diverse?" First of all I dont understand why we as human beings are always over analyzing things and trying to make it seem like technology such as the internet us setting us back.

In my opinion I think we are so far ahead of racisim and diversity than we were 100 years ago and I know all of us can agree on that. In a perfect world there would be no hate on gender, race, religion, etc but we do not live in a perfect world and it is time for people to start facing that. Also, lets be honest a perfect world would be absolutely boring so why are we always chasing after that?

I think people are who they are and feel the way they feel about things because how they were brought up and things they went through growing up and we cannot change that. Instead of worrying of trying to change everyone to the same beliefs and thoughts we should learn to agree to disagree.

I don't think the internet is making us less diverse because it opens us to be able to talk to all different kinds of people from all over the world. Therefore we are hearing millions of different opinions of different people. It's our choice on how we choose to listen to them and what they have to say and what we do with that information. I do agree with Weinberg though that we do tend to follow and surround ourselves with people that have the same opinions as ourselves but that's only natural, with or without the internet.

In conclusion I don't think that the world as a whole will ever not be racist or prejudice, but it's okay because if we didn't have different opinions and outlooks on life than we wouldn't be individuals.